Motherhood for me has been quite a roller coaster ride for me till date. That is because when you sit on it for the first time you don’t know what to expect the next second. It’s like literally you don’t know when will the baby poop and suddenly when he might get hungry. My journey has been some sorts of extraordinary . I call it extraordinary , because God chose me to mother a child single handedly. Jokes apart, I really don’t know what’s in store in the near future for me, relationship status wise(Yes I am positive) . But currently I am sailing solo in this beautiful journey of ‘Parenting’.
When Pooja of themumsnbabies invited me to hop onto this train, I got particularly excited. I think I don’t need to tell you the reason here. Well, well my entire blog revolves my little one Zuzu. So writing on this post , was just like writing my heart out, of what has changed inside me as I grow with Zuzu .
For me, the actual test of motherhood started when Zu was just nine months old . That was when we embarked on this journey of single-motherhood. And today , when I look back , all I see is a better and a much confident me. I can surely attribute it to my toddler girl- Right?
So let me run you how I have changed in these almost 3 years of motherhood :
1.I HAVE BECOME STRONG
Trust me when I say this, I have become more fierce and more strong now. Post motherhood or better single-motherhood, I was this shy lady who hardly spoke to anyone, remained in her own shell. As a kid I was an introvert. I would not say that being an introvert is a sin but things change post attaining motherhood. That is because when you bring a little soul in this world, you have umpteen questions that you just can’t stay to your own self. I have become more strong now. People are always there to judge me , for being a single mom and I was pretty sure that unless I became strong, I am landing up nowhere. I had to become strong for the little lass.
2.I TRUST MYSELF MORE
I would say that I have drifted from my core inherent behavior . Living up to the characteristics of a true Libran, I could hardly decide whenever I was given two choices. In a nutshell, I couldn’t take decisions on my own , leave trusting my own-self. Fast- forward to today’s time, I have come a really long cum satisfying way. A thing ,of what I am truly proud of – I trust my guts like never before . I guess motherhood makes you brave like a soldier who protects the borders from the enemy. There have been times when I have had to listen to all sorts of advises from friends and families. But in the end all I have done is what I felt was right for myself and Zuzu. I would like to say a popular Hindi sentence here:
Suno Sabki, Karo Apne Mann Ki 🙂
It means listen to everyone, but do only as per your own brain and heart 🙂
3.I HAVE BECOME LESS EMOTIONAL
I was a very emotional person until I started my journey of single parenting. Of course I had my bit of turmoil when I started it out. I was too apprehensive of myself and raising my kid in this part of the world where I live . Almost two years down into this journey , I am less emotional now. Earlier I used to cry on a spur of moment, but off lately situations have made me more practical. Not to forget my parents who see this drastic change in me and they are amazed and shocked at the same time. Frankly speaking I can’t afford to cry as my little one is watching me all the time. I really want her to soar and see her growing as an happy individual.
4. I AM MORE CAREFUL & MINDFUL
It has only been a few months since I came out in the open and starting talking about my single-parent status. I had my inhibitions earlier , all thanks to the society and even some close relatives who called themselves my well wishers. Trust me people have tried pulling me down for their own reasons whatsoever. This part of the world where I live mostly follows patriarchal format, and for even the tiniest things a woman is blamed. Also, I would like to highlight that by writing so, I am in no ways demeaning the male counterpart in our relationship. All I am trying to say is, people could have been a little easy on me. So I am always a little more careful at work, all because I don’t want to give an excuse of being a single mom. I am more mindful and careful because I don’t want to live on excuses- Again , because I am answerable to my daughter. People can be over courteous to me sometimes , and that sometimes becomes a bit creepy for me.
5.I HAVE UNDERSTOOD MY WORTH
When I talk about understanding my worth, I don’t mean I didn’t have any idea before. I guess as mothers we put everything on the forefront , whereas keeping our own wishes, whims and fancies at the back burner. I was no different, but I just couldn’t afford to belittle myself in this beautiful journey. This journey of blogging and particularly writing started when I used to feel low and wanted to express my inner self. That is when withlovezuzu was born , and since then it’s never looking back for me. I mean this blog is just an extension of my own true self and I am glad that I am putting some thing in my kitty with this blog.
6. I AM WORKING HARDER THAN EVER BEFORE
When I say that , I mean it quite literally . When I started writing, I was just letting my inner voice speak. That is because for me it’s easier to write than to speak about what I feel. But almost a year down the line into writing my rants, joys and other snippets of life which I share here, I have come a long way. I have really started to take the writing business more seriously now .Still miles away from the world’s most brilliant writers who have been a part of my childhood and have continued to inspire me. But like I said , I am writing more and more just for my little one to give her the best when she grows up – Both emotionally and financially. The writing industry is still developing in India, and I wish to earn through writing one fine day.
So quite recently , I was having a severe ache in one of my molars. I asked some of the most trusted friends on a whats app group, how painful is tooth extraction or a root canal treatment? And can you guess what was the reply?
Well one of them answered – ‘Hey Mumma, it can’t be worse than labor pain’ 😉. To which I then replied, I never had pains, as I was asked to for a Caesarean.Pat comes another reply, then hey ‘Labor Karma is coming back to you’ 😉
THE BLOG TRAIN
I am part of this blog train started by Pooja Kawatra of Mums & Babies and she has networked to bring together 41 moms across the GLOBE. (Meet the 41 moms here) . Pooja has also shared her own perspective on this here.
Next on the blog train is Shubhreet Kaur Kochhar who blogs at www.raisingkarma.in.
I came across this awesome Mumma on Instagram and we immediately connected.We have also met in person and she is one the most amazing human beings I have ever come across. I literally mean it, and not writing just because I am introducing her!
A former TV journalist , she is now the founder cum editor of RaisingKarma. Her blog mainly revolves around her travel stories and her beautiful daughter Karma. Not to miss her little one is just 2.8 years old but has already covered 10 countries. Shubhreet’s parenting articles have been featured in Baby Chakra, World Of Moms and Child Magazine. She has also been awarded the title of top ten mom bloggers to follow in India by WomensWeb. She currently resides in Mumbai and juggles between blogging and managing her home.